For senior outfielder Stephanie Ragusa, the 2020 softball season started off on a high note. She was part of a six-member senior class that was playing in its final season. Through 15 games, she was batting a team-best .400. That all changed on March 12, when the season was canceled due to COVID-19. Suddenly, her collegiate career and time with the Binghamton program was over. Ragusa will start up a full-time job at nearby Lockheed Martin in July. Until then, however, she has remained connected with her teammates and is very grateful for the years she has spent with the softball program.

Take us through the day when you found out the season was canceled.

That day was a filled with a rollercoaster of emotions. That Thursday (March 12) started off with an early morning team practice out on the softball field, which is usually supposed to be exciting because we don't get out on the field that often during early morning practice because of how cold it is. Although, something about that morning felt so uneasy. We started off practice with a team meeting regarding this virus that was "starting" to impact our season. We discussed the game plan, how we were going to go about remaining healthy as a team and what the potential next steps were going to be if our season was to be impacted. Practice continued as usual after the team meeting end but I could feel that everyone was pretty emotional and on edge. After practice, we had finished our morning with a team lift and then everyone went on with their days before we were supposed to leave for Virginia that afternoon.

I continued to go through my day with a positive mind set hoping that we were going to depart campus when we were supposed to. I packed my uniforms earlier than I usually do because I was trying to be overly confident that we were going to play that weekend. I spent some time at the Hungry Bearcat because I wanted to be around other student athletics and that is when Coach Johnston sent us a text saying that we would not be leaving for Virginia that day. After that text, my overly hopeful self lost all hope.

I then went to study hall with two teammates and we couldn't help but talk about what was happening. Every time I refreshed a social media page new information would pop up. "What was being canceled," "What was going to be canceled," "What time meetings were being held to make a decision about events being canceled." Our team group chat was constantly going off with new updates, everyone was so anxious about what was going to happen. I was texting back and forth with friends in other conferences and on other teams discussing what was going on at their schools also. I would be lying if I didn't say I was on my phone that entire day. We refreshed social media one last time and then there it was. We all had read that our season had been canceled. My two teammates and I picked up our books and went into the locker room. Everyone slowly made their way into the locker room and we just sat in our lockers in silence. There was not much to say. We were all in tears and trying to console one another but it was difficult for anyone to say anything. We all received another text from coach saying that we would be meeting as a team that night. Walking into that meeting was very difficult for me. My emotions were all over the place and it was truly heart-breaking listening and seeing how devastated my coaches and teammates were. We had worked so hard this year focusing on true team chemistry and having trust in one another and ourselves and one of the most disappointing things is that we didn't get to see how that hard work would of payed of.. A group of us walked out to the field after the meeting and took everything that the day threw at us in. We hugged and cried and just laid down in the outfield and talked about softball until it got dark.
 
 What were the feelings the team had in the immediate days that followed?

The immediate days following the cancellation of our season was like a dream. No one felt like what just had happen was actually real. We all woke up the next day and instantly were all texting asking how one another were holding up. Everyone was super confused and did not know what their next move was going to be. We were all talking about whether or not we were going to remain in Binghamton or if we were going to go home. It was overwhelming for everyone. Every day up until all final traveling arrangements were made, we saw each other as team. Our support to one another showed us there is so much more than being there for each other just on the field but it is even more important for us to be there for each other in a time like this.

The team had some last time together on the Sunday after the cancellation, what was that day like?

That Sunday was incredibly sentimental to the team but especially to the senior class. As a senior I know how appreciative the seniors were to have that time together as a team. The team set up the field like it would have been set up for our senior day and we could not have asked for anything more. It was unbelievable how the team got decorations and put together baskets for each individual senior so quickly. And our coaching staff provided food and helped out with everything altogether. It was a perfect Sunday afternoon. We had a really great day weather wise and it was really great to sit around the field one last time as Binghamton University Softball Team 2020.

You were off to a very good start to the season, batting a team-best .400. What was the key to your doing so well at the start of the year?

I think that this year I just approached everything a bit differently than I have the past years. Entering my last year at Binghamton, I felt super anxious and kept thinking about the future and how a lot of the things I will be experiencing this year would be my last time doing so. I felt like everything was moving in fast motion, especially when the season started approaching. I told myself that I wanted to strive to be PRESENT in every moment. I think that taking the time to take a deep breath in between every pitch made a world of a difference. If I noticed things were moving "too quickly" I made sure I took an extra second to step out and take a deep breath and slow things down. Giving myself this noticeable extra second allowed me to regain my focus and my confident attitude in that moment, which led to productive results.

The team has been able to keep a good bond, through Sunday Zoom meetings. What have those times been like?

Having weekly Zoom meetings have been a great way to stay in contact with everybody. The team really looks forward to seeing each other face to face. We usually go around and talk about what everyone has been up to and what fun things we are able to do to keep us busy during this time. It is very fun to listen to everyone's daily agenda because they are all so different. We have been grateful enough to have Nadine and Shelley join our zoom call and continue our leadership training. We have also had our academic advisor, Erica Foli and strength and conditioning, coach Bryan McGovern come on and update us on weekly changes that have been going on in the athletic department. It is extremely comforting to see such familiar faces join our zoom calls.  At the end of the zoom calls we pick a team challenge that we complete with our weekly group, which are then revealed at our next meeting and we vote as a team on who won the challenge. The team loves this -- it is hysterical to see what each team put together that week and it ends our weekly zoom meeting with a bunch of laughs and smiles.

How have you personally been able to adapt these past four weeks as you continue the semester?

I am actually having trouble adapting to this semester. I am having trouble maintaining a routine. Usually, in season everything is basically planned for me, so it is like going from one extreme to another. Not being able to finish this season has been emotional, but my family and teammates have played huge roles in helping me adjust while being home.

Do you know what your immediate plans are for next year yet?

I have accepted a full-time position in an Operations Leadership Development Program at Lockheed Martin in Owego, New York. I will be working in different areas of engineering that include quality, manufacturing, supply chain, material management, and operations engineering. After graduation I will be moving to Vestal and start working in mid-July. I am super excited and looking forward to starting this new experience!

Overall, what have you enjoyed most about being a part of the Binghamton University softball program?

I owe Binghamton University softball for developing me into the person I am today. Being a part of this program has showed me a tremendous amount of support from my coaches, trainers, academic staff and especially my teammates. It is definitely hard to pinpoint only one thing I am enjoyed the most about being a part of the Binghamton softball program. I enjoyed the excitement of loading the bus for a weekend, looking at coach at third base waiting for a steal sign, almost falling over in the dugout because everyone is cheering so hard, endless swings in practice until you hit a clean ball, cheering on a teammate in the weight room during testing, walking off the bus like zombies at three in the morning when we get back to campus after a long weekend and being pushed to be the best version of myself by teammates and coaches every day. There is an endless list of things that I have enjoyed most about being a part of the Binghamton Softball program, but one thing I am truly going to miss is seeing my teammates every day. They have become family and we have worked so hard together to push each other, go all out and trust one another and that is what I think I have enjoyed the most. I am so unbelievably thankful to have been a part of the Binghamton University softball program.